CLBRKS & Nicky Diesel - 10 Questions
Team Wordplay members Sleep’s Cousin & Lieu sat down with CLBRKS & Nicky Diesel for 10 questions, among others.
CLBRKS is a London based rapper who became known to the UK hip hop scene through Loudhouse cyphers with the likes of Lord Apex, Looms, Iamddb, amongst many others. He has since gone on to release projects through Blah Records with Morriarchi, as well as numerous independent releases with producers such as Vagrant Real Estate, Kiina & Dweeb.
Nicky Diesel has been steadily releasing singles & EP’s since 2019 such as ‘Deathcrows’ & ‘This & That’, the latter of which dropping through Costal Chill Records in February of this year. The pair met through social media some 2-3 years ago and have lots coming that we’re very excited about.
Key: SC. Sleeps Cousin, CL : Clbrks, ND: Nicky Diesel
Q1. SC: What's the worst gig you've ever played?
CL: It was somewhere in south London & my mate booked me to play before his hardcore band. I was on at 7 in the evening in the summer, it was still light. There was nobody there in this big space, so I just sat in the chair being a moody cunt in sunglasses.
Q2. SC: What's the worst gig you've ever been to see?
CL: I don't go to many. I like everything I'm just gassed to be outside. Honestly, just give me a beer, a fag, and I'm happy.
SC: You've never looked forward to seeing someone & they've fucked it all up?
CL: Yeah but I like 'em still. Sometimes its shit & they really fuck it up, but I don't think it's ever completely flopped.
Q3. SC: Marmite or Bovril?
ND: BOVRIL BRO! Anytime.
SC: First of all, you're wrong. But continue.
ND: I fucking love twiglets bro-
CL: Twiglets are more Marmite-y though
SC: Na Twiglets are wham. But bovril is shit.
CL: Have you ever had it on toast with butter though? Like you would Marmite.
SC: I can't say I have.
CL: Well then, you're fucking up.
SC: The only time I've ever been presented with Bovril is in a cup to drink it.
CL: Man, no. The same way you view Marmite, butter up some soft white toast, maybe like 3 or 4. Then mad butter, then add the Bovril like you would Marmite...and it's nice.
ND: Yeah and get it down with some Bovril tea.
CL: No no no. Bovril keeps you warm in the winter, it's a serious thing that we bond over, it's like sex, it's sacramental.
ND: It's like a hangover cure, y'know? Because it's got so much salt & stuff. Wake up feeling all dry & shit, Bovril, have a snus & then drink some water bro.
Q4. SC: Would you rather have to keep the big light on when you go to bed, but be allowed a pillow or not be allowed a pillow, but you can turn the light off?
ND: No pillow.
CL: I sleep with a pillow, I might not keep my head on it but I'll be hugging it. Fucking separation anxiety. I just need something to hold.
SC: You get your big spoon on with a pillow?
CL: Yeah I need one of them big anime waifu ones.
SC: You need one of those anime mouse mats with a titty wrist cushion too. Don't play cool with me I know you know what I mean.
CL: I'm just imagining the sneaky wank there. That's wild cuz. Real shit.
CL: Rest in peace Lil Chris.
Q5. SC: Would you rather never wear a t-shirt again or never wear shoes again?
ND: Probably t-shirt, I'd rather wear shoes.
CL: You know birds judge your whole life by your feet-
SC: I think you're seeing the wrong birds bro-
CL: Na I think YOU'RE seeing the wrong birds. You've gotta be careful with your feet in front of women bro.
ND: I was getting a foot massage & had to put this peeling sock on-
CL: Oof! My guy.
ND: Yeah the proper thing, she did my feet, toenails-
HB: I don't trust anyone near my toenails.
*disapproval in unison*
CL: You know what yeah, there might be a nail shop that's open til 10 anyway that we could go to. Go get a team peddy, all go get our feet done on the high street that'd be so gangsta.
Q6. SC: Would you rather be able to teleport, or have X-ray vision and why?
ND: Teleport, for sure.
CL: You can go anywhere right? If it's X-ray am I just seeing black and white or am I seeing people naked?
SC: If you want to.
CL: To be fair I'm not giving up teleporting. I'd be a pest just seeing people naked all day.
Q7. SC: Would you rather go 5 years back in time, but with your current consciousness & knowledge. Or have the knowledge of a year in the future today?
CL: What's 5 years ago, 2018? No. Fuck that.
SC: You wouldn't wanna go back and pass some knowledge to your younger self?
CL: Na I'd already fucked up by 2017. If you know what's happening a year from now can you change your destiny? Imagine if you saw into the future and you were just some deadout smack head in a year, sucking dicks for Quavers.
SC: Yeah if you saw that in your future you'd do everything you could to change it-
ND: You'd have to end it, wouldn't you.
CL: Honestly I'm so full of myself that I'd be like "na that's a year from now". It's like how I'm always like "yeah next year I'm gonna smash it". Every year I cry a little bit less. You know how they say "dads don't cry"? By the time I'm my dads age I won't cry at all.
SC: Not boys don't cry, strictly fathers?
CL: I've seen my dad cry one tear one time
SC: Na I must have seen my dad cry on 4 separate occasions-
CL: Bro your dad’s a bit moist. My child will never see me cry-
SC: To be fair two of those occasions were watching his video of West Ham winning the league.
Q8.SC Would you rather fart every time you sneeze or cry every time you burp?
CL: Cry. I'm crying dude.
ND: I don't like crying so I'd rather burp instead.
CL: How many times have you cried this year?
ND: More than 3 times, I'm an emotional boy.
SC: But crying every time you burp, I burp a lot I couldn't do with crying that much.
CL: I fart like a motherfucker. I shart like a motherfucker.
SC: Ok safe. Right, last two. I've saved these until the end for a reason.
Q9. Would you rather fuck a dog but no one knows about it, or not fuck a dog but everyone thinks that you did?
CL: I'd fuck a dog but nobody knows about it-
SC: Yeah? You gotta live with yourself-
CL: Actually, to be fair, every rumour you've ever heard about me is true. So if you said I fucked a dog & I didn't I wouldn't really care because there's all kinds of mad shit. Somebody said that they paid a crackhead to beat me up in McDonald's the other week. What about these guys, I've gotta know.
ND: I'd rather not fuck the dog, I don't really care what people think-
CL: My drilla! To be fair I've fucked a few dogs in my life time.
SC: But they only walked on two legs-
CL: Some on one.
Q10. SC: Final question. Would you rather have a 10" dick with no balls, or a 4" dick with balls?
CL: What are the balls saying?
Lieu: "Y'right mate"
SC: They're regular bollocks. What d'you mean?
ND: Does your voice go all high pitched and that?
CL: To be fair, most birds don't want a 10" cock, it's kinda wild.
SC: I mean, that's what they say, and I appreciate that.
CL: Listen man, we all like a nice 4" with balls. I'm a big fan of the 4" with balls. To be honest, my dick has been 4" long plenty of times. To me, 10" with no balls I'll take that any day. 10" hard or soft?
SC: 10" in use, so you're looking at 8.5-9" most of the time-
CL: Yeah so 10" hard, they'd love that. It's like an anomaly.
SC: I think that's a good place to call it a day. Thank you both for your time. We out!
Connect with CLBRKS + Nicky Diesel.
Words: Sleeps Cousin & Lieu
Pictures: Liue